How To Cure Depression: Bright Colours and Lots of Chocolate

Recently, I find myself sitting down to write and hitting a brick wall. Usually when I’m suffering from writers block I write myself a short nonsense piece that gets the creativity flowing. A short little thing that makes me laugh and brightens my mind.

But lately the short stories have become some what defeatist and dark. Not in a horror story way but in a realistic sense. I start to wonder if there is any point to the story, if any one will read it and if any one will care. This attitude seems to have spread to other parts of my life and I’m finding it harder to do the simplest of things with this constant impression that its all really pointless to do anything at all. I’m going to die eventually and then the sleight will be wiped clean. Nothing I do will have mattered, even if I changed the world. People would remember me for a while but I’d fade into history like most others. So what’s the point of wasting all that energy on trying to make a difference right?

That kids, is what adults call depression. Don’t do it. Just avoid that shit at all costs.

Depression comes in varying degrees but it always comes slowly. It creeps into your life like termites into a wooden building, quietly burrowing into everything. At first you don’t notice it. A stray negative thought here and another one there. You go on with your day feeling a little less satisfied, but that’s ok. It will get better in the morning.

Morning comes and it’s not really better but that’s ok, work will distract you. Soon you are living for tomorrow, putting off work, personal projects and even fun activities because they are too much effort right now and it will be easier to do them later, when you’re more motivated.

You’ve been putting things off for a while now and you aren’t being productive, so you begin to sink deeper. What are you doing with your life? Why can’t you muster up the drive to do something? Why are you so lazy? What’s wrong with you? Now starts the inevitable self berating that will only lead to more depression. And so the cycle continues, on and on into the empty abyss that is self contempt.

Now, I’m not saying I’ve sunk away into a black hole. But I’ve experienced depression before and its no tea party. The thing about depression is that you can get used to living with it and even make it a part of your every day life. Which is why you need to fix it before it gets to that point. In order to do that you need to recognize it when it starts to happening.

For some that may be easy. There are those who are very self aware, and for others it may be harder. But I’m not here to write a book. I promised I would give you the cure for depression, not help you diagnose the symptoms. That’s what quacks are supposedly for, but if you can’t find a good one then maybe I’ll write another article at a later stage. So here it is. My step by step guide to curing depression (Yes. You can totally trust me, I’m a fully qualified Senpai remember?).
Cut The Crap and Trash the Negativity

Just like the body is affected by bad food, so too can the mind be affected by bad thoughts. One of the first and most important steps to fighting depression is to remove as many negative influences and habits from your life as possible. You’ll want to start with the negative people in your life and if you’re depressed you more than likely have a few of those around.

As humans we don’t like to see others suffer, and our natural instinct is to comfort some one in pain. You may think that listening to that persons problem over and over again is helping them but it just makes you think in a more negative way and it reaffirms that persons negative situation. Avoid giving “complainers” sympathy and avoid becoming one in the process.

The same goes for habits that affect you negatively or make you see yourself in a bad light. Get rid of that shit, you deserve better hun.

Surround Yourself With Love , Light and Positivity

If you ask me, the hippies really got it right when it comes to this one, even if that’s just because they were stoned most of the time.

Being positive has a knock on effect just like being negative does, the more positive you are the more positive you feel and the more positive your life becomes. But being positive for no reason when you’re depressed can be difficult, so you actively have to go out and find it.

If you are too depressed to know if you will enjoy something just do it any way. Go for a walk in the park, eat an ice-cream, read a good book, go to the pet store and pet a puppy, listen to inspirational music, any of these things can start to lift your spirits. And that’s a step in the right direction.

Unfortunately, when we are depressed we also cut ourselves off from positive people by not interacting with them. It’s one of the first things we do when we go through a slump. Almost like we don’t feel like we deserve to be happy, so we don’t deserve to be around happy people. Find those happy people again and you’ll probably find your happiness right where you left it, with them.

Eat Lots of Chocolate

The human mind is simply a biological machine. And like any machine it can be easily programmed to respond in a curtain way.

One way to program it is by introducing chemicals and hormones into your system that can alter the brain chemistry to suit your needs. One such hormone goes by the name of Serotonin. Its the main ingredient in the happiness cocktail that’s released into the body when you fall in love or have sex.

This amazing little love bug is also present in chocolate, along with those really awesome anti-oxidant thing-ama-jigs that stop you from aging so fast. You’ll be happy and you’ll stay young.

Watch Lots of Anime

This one has a caveat to it. Let me try and rephrase this: Watch lots of HAPPY anime.

Research shows that bright lights and cute things can induce positive excitement in the brain which creates a positive reaction in ones body. And what is brighter and cuter than an anime like New Game? You just wanna reach out and squish your screen it’s so damn adorable. The same thing applies to Disney cartoons, although I have no desire to support Disney so anime it is.

Come on. Don’t tell me you don’t feel much better after watching a happy little anime.

Have Lots of Sex

As far as I am concerned, good sex cures cancer and it should be a god damn human right. But hey that’s just my humble opinion.

Just like chocolate, sex creates those “good-vibe” chemicals in your brain, only in larger quantities. And it doesn’t just give you a rush of happy time chemicals either, sex is also an incredibly healthy work out that helps you burn calories, tone muscle, get fit and gives you that after glow that every one notices.

Besides, what’s better than spending a weekend in a hotel room with your partner doing things that even Christian Grey would blush at?

Love Your Self

Ok. Maybe I should have thought twice about putting this heading under the previous one, but what the hell. That’s just how my dirty brain works and I love it. In fact I love it so much that I allowed myself to write something like that in an article that the public will read.


Because I think it’s funny and it makes me laugh, it makes me happy. And just like you feel the need to make your loved ones happy, you should in turn feel the need to make yourself happy to.

For me, this was a huge realization that essentially snapped me out of my last major slump. I was allowed to be happy! Not only that, but I was also allowed to love and care for myself.

Society tells us that it’s wrong to love ourselves. We can be proud of what we have achieved, we can like the way we look, we can like what we own, we can like what we do for a living, we can even like ourselves as human beings.

But society doesn’t teach us to love ourselves. In fact it slaps us over the heads and calls us vane if that love is not based on something physical.

Loving one’s self isn’t vanity because to love something is to accept it. So by deciding to love and respect yourself you are really just accepting yourself.

But to do this fully, you need to be able to talk to yourself. You need to ask yourself what you want out of life and how you want to be treated. Once you can honestly answer such questions you will start to see how others treat you.

The only person who understands you is you, and the only person who can truly love you the way you want to be loved, is you. Once you can be what you need for yourself, you will find that you have new standards by which other should treat you and you will start attracting good people into your life because you won’t stand for the way other have been treating you up until this point


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